courage and contentment
8 Jun
I know, I know, the damn cat’s dead. But there are so many precious photos of him that I haven’t yet plastered all over the internet! I love this one because Floyd, may he rest in peace, doesn’t even look like a real three dimensional figure in this photo, he just looks like a shadow of a cat.
I also love it because of the total contentment spread all over Chawser’s face. That’s bliss in cat form.
I’ve been having a lot of interesting conversations with friends lately about where they are in their lives – and whatever that sentence really means anyway. Since I’ve chosen to converse on a daily basis on this blog about where I am in my life, it’s not surprising that I’m attracting those same conversations about other people’s lives. It’s exciting to hear the people I care about vocalizing what they want and how they plan to get it. It also inspires me and makes me feel less judgmental of my own search.
As completely cliche as this might sound, I think it all boils down to courage – finding yours, and once you do, really using it and relying on it every single day. As the old Henry Ford quote goes, “Whether you think you can or you can’t, you’re right.”
Separately, but still related – I’ve recently been hearing and reading a common suggestion lately: that we cannot be held back by useless details. And that just before we die, we will not then consider x number of dollars in our bank accounts and we will not then obsess over our credit card debt and we will not then feel guilty for quitting a job we hated or leaving a relationship that made us feel less-than. Just before we die we will think of our family. And our friends. And the animals we loved. And the times we felt the proudest. And the food we loved the most. And the beautiful places we visited. And the books we read that were magical and the songs we heard that were magical and all the laughter and the times we cried so so hard and felt so so human.
It takes courage to let go of the minutia. It takes courage to look at the people across the table from you and enjoy being in their quiet presence, to breathe and be with them. Be. It takes courage to tell someone what you really think and it takes even more courage to wonder about yourself before you judge someone else. It takes courage to be compassionate, to strive to have original ideas, to not settle by copying someone else’s, to be calm and serene in potentially anxious moments. And it takes courage to say I don’t want to go to this job anymore, or I don’t want to live in this town anymore, or I don’t want to worry about my future anymore, or I don’t want to be overweight anymore, or I don’t want to struggle anymore, or I don’t want to look outside myself for the answers anymore. And then it takes even more courage to say what you DO want. None of that is easy. I certainly don’t have the hang of it yet. And we are all met, every day, with the challenge to be courageous.
Lately, every time a friend strikes up a conversation with me about wishing something were different in their lives, my response, perhaps almost annoyingly is, So go get it. Lately, I just don’t see another way.
Wow. That about sums it up. What an unbelievably moving post that seems to have come my way when I needed to read it most. I’ve been following your blog for a few weeks now and was so excited to see someone capturing their journey from “captivity” to FREEDOM
I hope to reach the point soon where I too can say: “Lately, I just don’t see another way.”
Wish me luck!
Thank you, Francesca. Best of luck to you in whatever you’re seeking. It sounds like you already know how to get there.
Very good.
One comment though, to the very last part :”So go get it”.
As boring as it is, reality still bites. We are connected to people, situations; economic or healtwise, responsibility… and the fact that our ability to choose and to have a real choice is dependent on all these things around us.
That is where the problem comes. Easy to say “so go get it”.
Isn’t telling people that only a way of saying “I am sick and tired of you always bringing up the realitystuff, lets drop reality”.
My point is that this is something we can only oppose in our own life, for ourselves, not put on to others, producing shame and guilt. We can never and will never fully understand any other situations than our own.
Live your thinking, that is the best help to others. Listening is worth so much more than advice.
I surched for advice – and found your page. That is the only way we can be help for others, by beeing a good example of our own wisdom. And by beeing there when people come for advice and wisdom.
You were here for me. Thank you.